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anxiety
and its effect on child
ren
by season vining adulting is hard?there?s work, laundry, home repairs, bills, a waning social life, and everything that goes along with having children. on top of that, we are living in a dangerous world that can cause fear and worry. it?s no surprise that parents these days are stressed out. while you try to bear the weight of life?s worries on your shoulders to shield your children, they are not immune to the anxiety you?re experiencing. ?ey see everything. children look to their parents for many things, including how to handle tense situations. ?ey learn how to cope with things by example. so, you need to ask yourself, ?what kind of example am i setting?? learning to effectively handle your own stress and anxiety is one surefire way to not pass it on to your children. easier said than done, right? kids and stress occasional anxiety is a normal part of life. your kid may be worried about a test at school or making new friends. samantha rauber, m.a., plpc, ncc, clinical therapist at legacy behavioral health of louisiana, shares, ?we know that a little anxiety can actually be a good thing when the child can channel the nervousness into a performance such as an athletic event or taking a test. children can also display developmentally-appropriate fears in certain situations such as meeting a new dog, going to a new school, and even fearing the monster under the bed.? ?ese are short term fears that usually resolve themselves. but for a child with an anxiety disorder, the stress is not temporary. it only grows and becomes worse over time. research shows that left untreated, anxiety disorders can cause children to do poorly in school, engage in substance abuse, and make them more likely to suffer from other ailments such as eating disorders and attention-deficit/ hyperactivity disorder. identifying anxiety big traumatic events or major life changes are more likely to trigger anxiety disorders in children. moving to a new town or experiencing a divorce can be a handful for an adult, imagine how hard it is for a child. rauber explains, ?when children who are predisposed to having anxiety (or not) meet varying degrees of fearful events, their vulnerable brains can relive the event over and over, and that event can grow scarier and scarier inside their mind, driving the behavior on the outside.? kids who have a history of mental or physical abuse are also more vulnerable to anxiety. so how do you know if your child has anxiety? if they experience excessive worry most days or for long periods of time, if they always imagine worst case scenarios, if they have trouble sleeping or experience sleepiness during the day, if they seem irritable or have difficulty concentrating, you may have an anxious child. rauber adds, ?anxiety can certainly become a barrier to normal functioning in its more severe forms. some signs are high distress, rapid heartbeat, shakiness, repeating irrational thoughts, disabling fears, panic, and even tantrums.? christina westbrook, ms, plpc, ncc of crossroads professional counseling, suggests to also look out for chronic complaints of neck pain, headaches, stomach aches, and fatigue. and to pay attention to any changes in behavior such as chronic crying, social isolation, and decreased school performance. what can you do? to put it simply, less anxious parents means less anxious children. if you, as a parent, learn methods to manage stress and anxiety, you will be teaching your child how to cope with stress and anxiety as well. ?anxiety breeds anxiety, so the calmer the parent can present in response to a child's anxiety, the better the outcome will be,? says rauber. our children take their cues from our behavior. it is important to offer them a positive example when dealing with uncertainty and doubt in any situation. once you?ve learned the methods to handle your own anxiety, you must model that for your children. maintain a calm appearance, even when working on managing your own anxiety. children soak up everything that you do. by keeping neutral facial expressions and 7 2 b r p a r e n t s . c o m | d e c e m b e r 2 0 1 7
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